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Guys- You saw me in the shower at the gym. You joked with your wife about how big my cock was. You invited me over. “Ok just this once she said”……Does she look like once is gonna be enough?

Look guys, I’m all for female empowerment and gender equality, but as a wise, fictional character once said: “This isn’t freedom. This is fear.” -Captain America

I hate how lonely I feel. Sometimes I have this phantom need to text her something, like we used to. A line of dialogue someone said or a bad joke. Because once upon a time I had that with her. But I need to smack my hand away or tell myself to fucking

That awkward moment when you start telling a story and you realise no one’s listening, so you slowly fade out and pretend you never said anything.

almyro: what a beautiful wedding want a beautiful wedding oh yes but what a shame what a shame the poor groom’s bride is a lemon stealing whore

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